What if you could have a good day everyday? What if you could remain peaceful in the midst of chaos? Let’s talk about this and see what we come up with.
Good: to be desired or approved of.
Bad: not such as to be hoped for or desired; unpleasant or unwelcome.
So according to the definition, a good day is when I get what I desire and approve of, and a bad day is when I experience unpleasantness or I have experiences that I do not welcome. Is this true for you? Ok, now let’s look at where “what I desire” comes from.
If I get up in the morning and it’s raining, does that mean it’s a bad day? Or if it’s raining, and I go to make a cup of coffee and find out I am all out of coffee on top of that wet weather, can I then say, it’s a bad day? Or does it have to be 3 things in a row? Let’s add one more – I go to get the morning paper and either someone has stolen it or it hasn’t been delivered. Or for a lot of us, it’s not a printed copy of a newspaper but an electronic version and your computer all of a sudden is not working. Now, I must truly be able say, I am having a bad day, right? Maybe not…
Let’s break each experience down to it’s root. So it’s raining and you prefer sunshine and you think to yourself, this is not the weather I want. It makes me feel gloomy. Does it really? Where did that belief come from? Did you always believe that rain makes a person feel gloomy? Seriously, think about it.
And you are out of coffee and now you might be believing something like, I am not going to feel as good without my morning coffee. Have you ever had a good day when you didn’t have coffee – I bet you have.
And oh my goodness, what will happen to me, if I am not up to date on the latest news about the scary things happening today in the world. I will look stupid at work when I can’t contribute to the daily conversation about what’s happening with the pandemic.
I learned a long time ago, that I cannot control what others think of me and truth be known, it’s none of my business anyway. The only person I am in control of is me. Whether, I am extremely knowledgeable about a subject or completely in the dark, if someone likes or dislikes me for either of these reasons, it’s a reflection on them and not on me.
Self- fulfilling prophecies? You bet! Arguing with what is, is the root of all our suffering.1 It’s more about believing negative self talk that we aren’t even aware that we are believing in. Where and when did you start believing that the sun is better than the rain? It takes the sun and rain for a flower to grow. The day you were born, did you care if the sun was shining or did you have a hissy fit when your mom took you to the hospital window and you saw rain? Ummmm, no I don’t think so. And your coffee passion, when did it start? When did you start believing, that I must have my coffee or I will not function properly? Yes, you might quickly say, well there’s a chemical reaction that happens inside my body when I drink coffee, and I need/want that. Is it true that you do actually need that? This is where the rubber hits the road.
There have been numerous scientific studies done in the interest of trying to find cures for this and that. Always as part of the study, a control group is required so data can appropriately be compared for the group that is getting the test med and the folks that are just swallowing a placebo. And almost in every case some, or in some cases, a lot of people get better when they are just taking the placebo. What does this prove? It proves strongly that the feeling and emotions that we experience start from what we truly believe in. See this video clip for more information to support this.
And not having your daily input of the so-called scary things happening in this world, do you really believe that your day is better when you feed yourself things that bring you down? Recently, I found a website that provides me with nothing but good news. It didn’t take me 2 seconds to subscribe to that site. Almost instantly, after looking at just the first page, my spirits were elevated.
So isn’t it interesting, that when I really, really look at what determines if I am having a good day or bad day, I discover that it is me and the decisions I make, and not the actual experiences or events by themselves. I discover that in a lot of cases as I trek through my day, that what is presented to me is neither good nor bad – it just is. It’s only when I add my story to the experience that it becomes good or bad. This is exciting and powerful news. It means I can stop creating days that put grey clouds over my head. I just go up above those clouds and see the sun – it is always there.
See what Eckhart Tolle2 says to support how we create negative thinking and unconsciously cause our own bad days. It will put a smile on your face.
Just by discovering that I have the power to create good days for myself, I have also realized that when I do, as a side-benefit to me enjoying each of my days, I realize that I can help to create good days for others as well. Think about it – isn’t it wonderful to be in the presence of someone who is enjoying their day?
“Transforming ourselves will transform the world.“
This is no airy fairy statement – it is factual. Don’t take my word for it. Put it to the test and try it out for yourself. Unless of course, you would like to keep your so-called bad days.
“It’s a perfect universe – there’s no stress in it. There’s only people thinking stressful thoughts.” (Byron Katie)
I have finally realized what “it’s all good” means. I have always had the power to put my slant on life’s experiences and more often than not, my slant was not conducive to living a joyful, happy life. Realize that if you take the time and ask yourself enough questions about anything in life that seems to be causing you pain, you will eventually get to the root of your suffering. And it always is thoughts like these: Will I get hurt? Will I suffer? Will I be strong enough? Will anyone care about me? Will I be embarrassed? Will I have enough to eat? Will I have enough money?
And why does it matter if I do get hurt, if I do suffer, if I am not strong enough, if I get embarrassed, if I have to eat itchy band instead of steak, or if I don’t seem to have enough money? If these things are meant to happen, they are going to happen. Resisting them doesn’t make them go away and can only strengthen our uncomfortable feelings. What you resist, persists and inflates what is actually happening. Like Eckhart Tolle says, thinking to yourself, “I am ruined, I am going to go bankrupt“, is my story. “I only have fifty cents is my bank account” is a fact. See the difference between the two scenarios?
Mark Twain said, “I’ve had a lot of worries in my life, most of which never happened.” Life will give you whatever experience is most helpful for the evolution of your consciousness. And when you wake up your mind to see what’s really real, you discover that nothing is as big and insurmountable as the mind makes it out to be. So if I am hungry, chances are pretty good I won’t be hungry for long. What could fill me with a lot of pain and anguish would be to believe that I will always be hungry. Nothing in life is permanent, including what seems to be painful unless we allow ourselves to believe that it will be unending.
It’s all good – if it’s not, then I am choosing to remain asleep.
I hope now that you can see, at least a little more clearly, that it is entirely possible that not having coffee, or not being able to see today’s news, or not having the sun shine on a particular day are not good experiences or bad experiences. They alone do not have the power to make your day good or bad. It’s all in your hands! When we question our thoughts and throw away the ones that are not true, your peaceful day is only a truthful thought away.
Wishing you a good day, go and create it! Onward and upward…
- Byron Kathleen Mitchell, better known as Byron Katie is an American speaker and author who teaches a method of self-inquiry known as “The Work of Byron Katie” or simply as “The Work.” Wikipedia
- Eckhart Tolle is a spiritual teacher and best-selling author. He is a German-born resident of Canada best known as the author of The Power of Now and A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose. In 2008, The New York Times called Tolle “the most popular spiritual author in the United States”. Wikipedia